Where are you? Prayer..

When the storm is ceasing to end

It is when I  start to  forget  You easily

Whereas  You  have been waiting for me to put off  Your longing for me..

Forgive me when I was driven all my needs to be fulfilled and I forget about You

I should have been after You, than after my need to be fulfilled by You

Boby- Seharusnya

The Song above was a song I sang few moments ago with my small group choir in my Church in the same time I was in huge need to have something or certainty about it. I was praying earnestly, lay all my request before God and spend more time than usual to seek counsel through Bible with God. Now I haven’t got any of those request, or perhaps any of those obsessions.

But I see how contrast it is. The time I spend to pray to God before I have huge need and when I have nothing before him is different, much more time in the former. I don’t say that bring all the needs, request and anxious feeling is not important but how often you are praying to  spend time with Him,just stay and be still bring thanksgiving and adoration to God, rather than bring your anxiety and needs to God.

I found myself in the last 27 years of my life, incline to have huge enormous time with God when I, , when I am in big fear, fall in Love, when I facing uncertainty, in Danger, and then busy with everything and gradually forgetting time in prayer to the everlasting hand.

In the Bible looks like it is a pattern that people of Israel perpetually do, and perhaps every Human being does. My mate in island of Sumba who is, by any means necessary facing life threatening danger in his daily basis, said to me

“Brother it is when we are facing challenges, we are led to God”

Would have been true for him, but humanly speaking, how bad I am on relationship with Him, I will come around when I have need to ask God.

It is really obvious that I put God in few step down stairs below my needs, I don’t put God as my primary focus of my life. If I do put Him in the top of everything so whether in huge need or not, I will not spend time of prayer differently, Or I will not only seek Him when I am in need.

..I will say that when we aren’t keeping our guard spiritually and making God our first priority, we are setting ourselves up for failure.

Adam Worthman ,Time-out

But in every breath that I take, and more and more the longing to be with him and finally become like Him.

“In perfect humility all selfishness disappears and your soul no longer lives for itself or in itself for God: and it is lost and submerged in Him and transformed into Him.”

– from “New Seeds of Contemplation”  Thomas Merton


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